Choosing your future baby daddy!

This Father’s Day is the first time I get to celebrate the incredible daddy to my baby! I am SO blessed and so thankful that I chose wisely for Sienna, and our future children to come (no, I am NOT pregnant ha!)

If I could give some advice to all you single ladies out there dreaming about your future family, I would say to be sure to choose carefully not only for you, but for your kids. Who you choose to marry is who you are choosing to be the father to your children. I feel like this gets forgotten when we are looking for a spouse. When choosing a spouse you are always choosing a partner to parent. Marriage is so much bigger then just you and your spouse (unless you know you do not want to have kids). Marriage is creating a legacy with someone. I will talk more on creating legacy in a future post but for now here are some qualities I would suggest to look for in the future father of your children..

  1. A servant. At the end of the day marriage and family life is all about serving. Becoming a wife, husband, and a parent is choosing to love sacrificially. It is choosing to serve your family. If you are interested in someone and you can’t find them serving and looking for ways to bless others then I would red flag that. Seth constantly serves Sienna and I…without me having to even ask! If you met Seth you will instantly say, “wow, he is such a servant”. He is always looking for ways to go out of his way for Sienna. For now I guess you could say that is changing a lot of poopy diapers lol 😉
  2. Not lazy. Marry a man who will do whatever it takes to work hard and provide for your family. I am not saying that you can’t work and have to be a stay at home mom if you don’t want to be. But you don’t want to end up with someone who is wanting to just chill out, work a part time job, while you are trying to be a full-time mom and hold a job (if you are working). When I was born my dad was a full-time musician. We were living in Nashville and he was playing gigs. However he didn’t have a steady income to be able to provide for me. He said that after I was born he stood over my crib and looked down at me and told me that he was going to lay down his dream of music to help me to be able to live out my dreams. He ended up leaving the music scene, moved to LA and got a career job that he has now been with for 30 years.  He was willing to do whatever it took to give me a good life and for that, and so many other things, I am forever grateful for my dad. Which leads me to number 3..
  3. Selfless. If you marry someone who is always so concerned about their life and dreams they won’t have created space to help your children live out their dreams. They will be the Dad who is always absent at the soccer games, the dance recitals, and family dinners. Being a parent is choosing to put your children before your dreams. To give them all that they need to succeed in this life. To give them all the love they could possibly need.
  4. Devoted. For me, that priority was someone who is devoted to the Lord. I saw Seth’s devotion to God and knew that would overlap into his devotion to a family. He is devoted to our family. To love us, to create a safe place, to honor us, to remain faithful, and most importantly, to show us the heart of God.
  5. A tender heart. In the past our society has shown the man as someone who is a “man”. Doesn’t cry, doesn’t show emotion because if he does he is weak. But actually a father is someone who connects to your heart. He connects to the heart of his children and can show them tenderness, care, and love. Seth is Sienna’s playmate for sure, and loves rough housing her (a little more then I love to watch haha) but he is always so tender and loving to her as well. He is showing her how a princess should be treated by a man. She will know what she deserves and will look for that in her future spouse based off of what Seth shows her. Seth listens to me, he wipes my tears, he is patient with me (for the most part lol) and he shows me love. And I absolutely love watching him do the exact same for Sienna.

This Father’s Day maybe take some time to list out some more qualities that you want in your future baby daddy 😉 You might not have come from a home that was filled with love from your dad. Maybe he was absent, or verbally/physically abusive. My heart hurts for you if that was your experience of a father. I pray that God will show you His love as your Father and would help you to remember that you and your children deserve the best. That your babies deserve to be loved tenderly, championed, provided for, celebrated and adored by their dad.

To my baby daddy…Seth, Happy First Father’s Day! I know you had no clue I was going to do this blog post. This is a tribute to honor you and the amazing daddy you are to Sienna. I have fallen more in love with you over the past year as I have watched you love her and care for her. You are as good as they come and I am so thankful that Sienna has you to show her how a man should one day love her. We love you!!!!!!! XO

Carly5.28-43Carly5.28-40Carly5.28-81Carly5.28-77Carly5.28-70All photos by: Sarah Schweyer Photography

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